Loading.../script.js at main · HenVogel/Loading... · GitHub

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constloadingMessages=[
"Loading shaders... done. Reloading shaders... done. Deleting shaders.",
"Verifying existence of reality...",
"Almost there. Just kidding.",
"Contacting server... no response. Contacting hell... connected.",
"Initializing existential dread...",
"Calculating meaning of life...",
"Loading your patience...",
"Preparing disappointment...",
"Generating random excuses...",
"Downloading more RAM...",
"Defragmenting your soul...",
"Compressing your hopes and dreams...",
"Reticulating splines...",
"Calibrating reality distortion field...",
"Synchronizing with parallel universes...",
"Loading loading screen...",
"Please wait while we pretend to load...",
"Time is an illusion. Loading doubly so.",
"The cake is a lie. The loading is eternal.",
"Your computer is not broken. This is intentional."
];

letprogress=0;
letcancelClicks=0;
letstartTime=Date.now();
letlastMessageTime=Date.now();
letmessages=[];
letlastProgressUpdate=Date.now();

functionupdateProgress(){
constnow=Date.now();
// Only update progress every 2 seconds
if(now-lastProgressUpdate<2000)return;
lastProgressUpdate=now;

if(progress===99){
messages.unshift("Close enough but actually not close enough");
if(messages.length>5)messages.pop();
progress=Math.floor(Math.random()*89)+10;// Random number between 10 and 98
}elseif(Math.random()<0.25){
progress=Math.max(0,progress-Math.floor(Math.random()*3)+1);
}else{
// 75% chance of no progress, 25% chance of +1
progress=Math.min(99,progress+(Math.random()<0.75 ? 0 : 1));
}
document.querySelector('.progress').style.width=`${progress}%`;
document.querySelector('.percentage').textContent=`${progress}%`;
}

functionaddRandomMessage(){
constnow=Date.now();
if(now-lastMessageTime>(Math.random()*45000+15000)){
constmessage=loadingMessages[Math.floor(Math.random()*loadingMessages.length)];
messages.unshift(message);// Add new message to the beginning
if(messages.length>5)messages.pop();// Remove oldest message if we have too many

constmessagesDiv=document.querySelector('.messages');
messagesDiv.innerHTML=messages.map(msg=>
`<div class="message" style="opacity: 1;">${msg}</div>`
).join('');

lastMessageTime=now;
}
}

functionapplyGlitch(){
constglitchDiv=document.querySelector('.glitch');
consttimeElapsed=(Date.now()-startTime)/60000;
constglitchLevel=Math.min(100,timeElapsed);

if(Math.random()<glitchLevel*0.01){
glitchDiv.style.backgroundColor=`rgb(${Math.random()*255}, ${Math.random()*255}, ${Math.random()*255})`;
glitchDiv.style.opacity='0.1';
setTimeout(()=>{
glitchDiv.style.backgroundColor='transparent';
},500);// Increased from 100ms to 500ms
}
}

functionhandleCancel(){
cancelClicks++;
if(cancelClicks>=1000){
document.body.innerHTML=`
 <div style="position: fixed; top: 50%; left: 50%; transform: translate(-50%, -50%); font-size: 48px;">
 REBOOTING...
 </div>
 `;
setTimeout(()=>{
window.location.reload();
},2000);
}else{
// 50/50 chance to add or subtract 1%
progress=Math.random()<0.5 ?
Math.min(99,progress+1) :
Math.max(0,progress-1);
document.querySelector('.progress').style.width=`${progress}%`;
document.querySelector('.percentage').textContent=`${progress}%`;
}
}

// Initialize
document.querySelector('.cancel-button').addEventListener('click',handleCancel);

// Main loop
setInterval(()=>{
updateProgress();
addRandomMessage();
applyGlitch();
},1000);